TOP Ten Mistakes Made Last July 4, But Not 2012

Strips and stares, forever

By Al Carlos Hernandez, Contributing Editor
Published on LatinoLA: July 2, 2012

TOP Ten Mistakes Made Last July 4, But Not 2012

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10. You bet 50 bucks that Anderson Cooper was not gay.

9. Your three-alarm chili plugged every toilet west of the Mississippi.

8. Told familia you were on a 4-week picnic when in fact you were homeless.

7. Cherry bombs out of control ... all the birds on the fence went bald.

6. Shot a few rounds up in the air, bullets came down and now you needed a new roof.

5. Your unibrow is gone and the cat is deaf.

4. The tamale pressure cooker blew up went into space and you won a science grant.

3. Homemade fireworks consisted eating cabbage burritos, then being followed by dudes with Bic Lighters.

2. Remember, it's "Oh say, can you see" not "José, can you see."

1. Arizona police karate-chopped you in the throat while you were looking up at fireworks display.

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