I Guess That's Life

We all have that one crush we'll "love" forever.

By Liliana Mota
Published on LatinoLA: November 19, 2012

I Guess That's Life

I guess that's life.

I don't get it, I probably never will, but I guess that's life. There's a quote that goes, "We ignore those who adore us, adore those who ignore us, hurt those who love us and love those who hurt us." Ironic, but it's true.

Here's my story.

I have a best friend, Roy; he has an older brother whom I've been crushing on for months. I suck at dating, I always say the wrong things, and I'm not a girly girl. I can barely put on make-up the right way.

Well, one day I had this genius idea (or at least I thought it was). I text his mom and confessed to her that I liked her oldest son. Of course, she was filled with joy -- she loves me. I mean, who doesn't? I'm practically the perfect Mexican, I can clean, cook, I go to school and I work. Okay. Maybe I'm not the perfect Mexican but I like to believe that.

Anyway, his mom set up a "date." He had no idea that I texted his mom (and up until this day, he still doesn't know). He sent me an email asking if I wanted to grab breakfast the following morning (of course I was jumping up and down like a pathetic little girl). It was finally happening, the guy who I've been crushing on was going to take me out on a "date."

Fast forward.

It was a Saturday morning and we went to Johnny Rockets for lunch. I was extremely nervous, and when I get nervous I don't talk. I will be as quiet as a mime. Everything that came out of my mouth was a stutter. But hey, can you blame me? I was with the guy that I've liked for months. Throughout the entire "date" I kept telling myself to relax, but that wasn't helping, I just kept making myself look like an idiot. It happens. I guess.

The "date" was over and I went home. That night I received a text message from my best friend, Roy, that read along the lines of: "You can do better than my brother!" When I read that, my heart sank. I blew it. The "date" went horrible. So of course, given that I'm crazy, I hopped on my computer and sent him and email (yes, an email not a text message, I was trying to be formal). I spilled the beans and told him I liked him.

?íHijole! The things I do. He replied within minutes and he was very polite about everything, but sadly, he didn't like me. I was sad, but had to accept reality. Things were awkward for a few days but then everything went back to normal.

Okay, enough of the rambling and let's cut to the chase.

A couple week after that, we hung out a few times (along with my friends Roy and Lindsey), once at Applebee's, once at the movies and once at a haunted maze park (it was the weekend before Halloween). I was caught off guard, why was he inviting me to hang out, on top of that, why was he paying for everything?

Oh, get this. When we were at the haunted maze, he even grabbed my hand, but of course in a friendly way because the tunnel was dark and scary.

Now, I don't get it.

I know he doesn't like me, but I can't seem to accept the fact that it's never going to happen. I cried, haha, I actually shed a tear because he doesn't even look at me that way. I'm pretty pathetic. But, I guess that's life. We crush on those who don't want us, and ignore the ones who do.

Now my question to you guys is, should I let it go? Or should I just keep attempting at dropping hints that I still like him?

And on a side note, I pray to baby Jesus that he will never read this because then I'm just going to look like even more of a psycho.

Editor's Note: Help Liliana out! Discuss below...

About Liliana Mota:
Journalism major at California State University, Fullerton.
Author's website
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